Good morning everyone! This morning I'm sharing Amanda's story. You can find her blog here. Each Monday the website will feature a new mama story so be sure to submit yours if you'd like to be featured.
My name is Amanda Millington and I am married to my high school sweetheart, Adam Millington. We found out we were pregnant in August of 2014. Appointments started quickly and everything seemed to be going perfectly. I noticed almost every time we went to the Dr. they were doing a scan and would say that they didn’t get a good picture because our baby was hiding so we would need another one.
Since this was my first pregnancy, I was all rainbows and butterflies. I knew miscarriages and stillbirths happened sometimes but of course, never to me. Unfortunately, we were referred to a high risk Dr. the day before Christmas Eve. We had a scan that took forever, we then sat in a room and were told of all the missing parts of our daughter's brain and if she was able to survive, what her quality of life would be. We were told she would be blind, most likely deaf, and unable to do anything for herself. Our world shattered. As weeks went on and more scans and tests were done, the results just kept getting worse. I was unsure if I should be preparing for a disabled child or for my child to pass.
On January 22nd, 2015 our daughter Riley Renee Millington passed and I had to deliver her and never hear her cry. We had her cremated and her ashes are safely kept in a pink bear that my husband and I made at Build-A-Bear when we learned she wasn’t going to make it. We call it Riley Bear. It has been a long journey of learning how to grieve someone that was never heard or felt by anyone else but my husband and I but somehow, I miss her every single day. We are now blessed with a beautiful Rainbow Baby that was born on October 15th, 2016 (Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Day) and that just feels like it was a gift and sign from her!